We Truly Are....

i generally believe in things coming in threes...means pay attention to this...this is important...and the opposite...often bad comes in threes also...and then it is done for a while. as you all know i have been struggling of late with, well, with lots of things. but the universe, god, however you choose to say it, has been paying attention. and knowing me like he does, has not only sent confirmations thrice, but has kept them rolling in everywhere i turn!

i posted day before yesterday about creating a new new year for myself that day...my part, i think...my reaching out...and that was honored with a lovely, uplifting comment from my friend viv, then later in the day an old friend of my mom's called (i know, random, right?)...just to say she had been thinking of me all day, and wanted to wish me a happy new year. at first i put the happy note in my voice for her but she saw right thru it and began asking me and gently coaxing me to answer "what are you afraid of?" wow. so many things. i hadn't even realized i was fearful, that that was a huge part of this yuck. putting it into words was empowering. and her fervent prayer for me over the phone left me breathless and so much lighter. cleansed.

immediately after this another friend phoned just to chat...and i laughed so hard (thru my tears! the best kind!) i thought i would pee my pants! another cleansing and release! and perfectly timed. wow.

then, (number 4 now) upon returning home from picking up K i saw that an artist friend had called. and when i returned her call..."just thinking about you today, you ok??" tears of gratitude at the knowledge, since apparently i had forgotten, that i am loved, i matter, what i do matters, and others get what i am going thru, i'm not crazy! this friend in particular has a great, no nonsense way of breaking things down....all i had to say was "i'm blocked" and she began..."well, it's no wonder. christmas is over, and you are the woman. so you DID christmas...from the decorating, to the list making, to the buying, to the budgeting, to the cooking, to the family organizing, to the wrapping, and the getting everyone where they should be when, and the party attending, and the family get-togethers, and then, BAM! it's over, and you take it all down, the house is barren, unless you have the energy to redo it all immediately, which you don't, and you are expected to go back to work and create anew as if you aren't spent in every conceivable way. no wonder!"

sigh. someone gets it. and this is really number 5 because robyn told me this a week ago...i just didn't understand at the time that it would take this amount of whatever this is to get thru it. and not that i am completely, but i am aware, and that is alot. i will eventually learn to listen, and to "get it" at the pebble and not the brick wall!!

then, (up to 6, now!) i decided that i would watch the oprah i had tivo'd (tivoed? tivod?) and i'll be damned if it wasn't an entire hour of spiritual teachers and learning to lean into the yuck so that you can get thru it to the other side where the greatest things that you cannot even imagine await, and the personal growth you will experience by having gone thru this you cannot even imagine. and me, who has this weird thing with deleting all watched shows could not delete this. too too much to digest all at once. i will be watching this again. powerful. powerful. powerful.

7.) this morning i visited a couple of blogs i haven't in a while, and whitney over at the artist's life had this to say. 8.) and liz who writes bepresentbehere reminded me to do this. absolutely something i should be more mindful of. i literally can become a slave to the to-do list. pause and play. still trying to find my "word" ala ali edwards style for the year, maybe i can have 2??

so, needless to say, i am humbled. the universe cares so much for me (and for you!) that every single where that i turn, and some that simply turned to me, i am being reminded of it. because that is what i need right now, a reminder, or 8 (and still rolling in, because i am open)!! what has the universe been reminding you of lately? what are you open to? what are you hoping to learn this year? is there one word that is "your" word for the year?